test of time

This week I found out that our school district will be switching from half day to full day Kindergarten beginning this coming school year. They've been talking about doing this for several years but were never able to because of budget issues...well I guess this year they found the money they needed and so the decision has been made. Sigh. Maddox's teacher gave me the news as I picked Maddox up from school one morning and as soon as she shut the van door and I pulled away I burst...BURST...into tears! Maddox was looking at me like I was plain crazy and Ashtyn was tearing up himself (he has such a tender heart...)! I called Brandon and my sister and my mom and everyone else who I knew would agree with me about this great injustice to society and would allow me to wallow in my self pity as long as I needed to. I cried alot that day. I'm not ready for both of my boys to be in school all day. At this point, I'm pretty sure I'm having a pre-mid life crisis! What will I do with myself?? My friends all tell me that I'll be fine and that after I adjust to the new schedule I'll actually enjoy it! But I don't know. It just doesn't seem like that right now. About a week had passed since I learned of the new all day kindrgarten schedule when I layed down to nap with Maddox. I looked at him from across the sofa; chubby cheeks drooping, double chin protruding, full lips pursing and his chunky little body tucked comfortably under his fuzzy blanket and it hit me all over again. I don't want these moments to end! I wish quiet afternoon naps could last forever and ever! Ultimately, I know that there are many more years of memories ahead and my boys are far from not needing me anymore but I think just the fact that my boys are 7 and almost 5 proves to me how fast time truly does fly by! So...really what I've learned over the last week is that for the next 3 months, until school starts back up, I will be holding, hugging and kissing my little boys as much as humanly possible! Ha! Whenever Maddox asks to be held while he falls asleep I will only say "YES!" and whenever Ash asks me to play Wii instead of doing the laundry I will say "YES!" to that too! Time truly does slip through our fingers and I'll be spending my summer desperately grasping and clinging to all the time I can...