life of gray

Gray was born on December 4, 2007. I'll never forget when Jill told me she was pregnant with him. It was just after Fine Arts weekend in the spring. She called me on the phone and, I remember like it was yesterday, I was sitting on my sofa in my living room and when Jill gave me the news I  believe I screamed! Literally screamed! We had been teasing Jill about having another baby for years. Seth was 7-years-old and to be totally honest I think most of us were losing hope. Ha! But finally Doug and Jill were having another little bundle of joy and we were so excited! Jill is the most beautiful pregnant woman you can imagine. Few truly have that pregnancy "glow" but Jill does. When Doug and Jill found out they were having another boy and they were choosing a name for their second son I have a very vivid memory of sitting in the church offices with Jill and her telling me she thought they had chosen a name. As all girlfriends do, she wanted to run it past me and see what I thought. Of course, it was perfect. She went on to tell me that they wanted to name their son Grayson Paul but would call him Gray. Jill said that for some reason she felt that she should give this child a "strong" name and, to her, Gray fit the bill perfectly. A mother's intuition has never been more right.

When Gray was born my family was in the middle of having our family Christmas pictures taken. Once I heard Gray had arrived I couldn't wait to get to the hospital! I rushed to Jill's hospital room as quickly as I could and held little Gray for the first time. What a beautiful baby boy he was. We are all very familiar with Gray's life. It may have been short but it was most definitely lived to the fullest. Gray taught me more in his 4 1/2 years on this Earth than anyone else has or will. He changed me for the better and I am so thankful to have known him and blessed to have been a part of his little life from the very beginning to the very end. Every up and down. Every tear and smile. I cherish each moment I was able to experience with him and hold them very close to my heart.

This year on Gray's birthday he would have been 5 years old. This was his first birthday celebrated in heaven! Doug, Jill and Seth celebrated the day and celebrated Gray's life with a small birthday get together. It was strictly family and a few friends. Jill had a beautiful cake made that was light blue with red stripes. A gray heart was placed on top with a tiny red butterfly resting on its side. The top of the cake read "Always in our Hearts". I was speechless when I first saw the cake. We spent the evening looking at pictures of Gray, sharing stories and memories, shedding tears and laughing until we couldn't breathe! Gray touched and shaped yet another day in each of our lives.

Gray is greatly missed. My boys miss him, Brandon and I miss him, all of his friends and family miss him but I'm sure it goes without saying that no one misses him more than his mom, dad and brother. I can't imagine the loss they still feel to this day. Jill said it best, though, at Gray's 5th birthday celebration when she said that Gray would have wanted us to continue laughing and making memories. He lived in the moment and although he wasn't able to attend his party this year he definitely reminded me that I too should live every moment to the fullest simply through his memory. Thank you Gray and a very happy birthday to you! I only wish that we could have all seen the silly dance that I'm sure you were doing as you turned 5! Save a dance for me!